Day 7

Can you find GOD in a movie? I've been trying to watch a movie about Rich Mullins. I have some of his music; I've seen him in concert one time way back when I was in college. I don't know how accurate the film is, but when Rich hears Brennan Manning on a tape, he is so moved that he has to stop on the side of the road. If the film is accurate, he was a lonely man. He was a little boy longing for his father's love, and for whatever reason, his earthly dad would never give it to him.

I didn't grow up in that same environment, but I have always felt lonely. Different. Odd. Not fitting. Not the "join the crowd" kind of fitting in, but meshing with those around me - even in my own family. These last years have worn me down. Does GOD love me just as I am? I know I don't have to be perfect and accomplish this or that, but does GOD really love me just as I am with my stumbling over words and not figuring out what to say until it's too late? Does HE love me in my hermit-like state? How does HE delight in me when I see the world so differently? When what I mean as simply observation or opinion is taken as criticism or complaining?

This will take some time.